Our Words Matter - Adoption / IVF Edition
- theashleyvicari
- 3 days ago
- 2 min read
✨ In mental health, words matter. Words can cut deeply or mend the wounds. Words can affirm and validate, moving us towards repair and healing. Words can also perpetuate negative thought spirals and leave us feeling stuck in the low.
✨ In our new series: “Our Words Matter,” we invite you to hold a mirror to the cultural values and experiences that have shaped your vocabulary; noticing perhaps when a shift in words can be critical for both your healing and the healing of others.
✨ When speaking to parents who have experienced adoption in any form such as egg, sperm, embryo, or child,
Instead of using:
“real mom” or “real dad”
For the brave and kind individual who adopted out or donated…
✨ Try…
✨ For adoption of an egg, sperm, or embryo:
Donor
Egg Donor
Sperm Donor
Genetic Donor
✨ For adoption of a child:
Biological Parent
Birth Parent
First Parent
Natural Parent
Tummy Mom
✨ “A real mom is someone who holds her child while they cry, feeds her child when they are hungry, Band-Aids and kisses their scrapes and wounds, cuddles her child when they are scared of monsters, teaches her child the difference between right and wrong, and sets healthy boundaries to ensure the child feels safe. That is what a real mom is.”
-Jessie Princeton
✨ Why this matters… Because just because someone has gone an “unconventional” route to parenthood does not mean that they are not a “real mom” or a “real dad.” Words have the ability to allow the stigma of unconventional routes to fester and embed themselves in the psyche of the vulnerable individual who engaged in adoption, IVF, and other routes.
✨ Sources:
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